Self Reflection

End of season 1

 Life is all about understanding, patients and enjoying life. When we lose sight on just the small things such as, enjoying our partner time and joining in on the laughter that fills the room, we lose a part of ourselves.  When we focus on the stuff that we can't control, life get kind of messy and in my honest opinion life is all about enjoying the time that we have.

Expectation Part Two (Preview)

Every day is a new day, so make it count!

Photography by, David Sierra

Expectations

 I came across this article by John Gottman;  The Truth About Expectation In Relationships.  And it talks about the good enough relationship the title alone I know it sounds like that you’re settling but in the article it talks about what we need to do and stop putting so much expectation on our relationship, not in a bad way, just we have to look at the relationship as for what it is and set real expectation.

Let me give you a couple of lines from the article that stands out for me.

"Many marital therapists tell couples to expect less. If you lower your expectations, the argument goes, then you won’t be disappointed by your partner. This advice is wrong. Donald Baucom, a psychology professor at The University of North Carolina, studied marital expectations for a decade. He found that people get what they expect. People with low expectations tend to be in relationships where they are treated poorly, and people with high expectations tend to be in relationships where they are treated well. This suggests that by having high standards, you are far more likely to achieve the kind of relationship you want than you are by looking the other way and letting things slide."

The “Good Enough” Relationship

"In a good enough relationship, people have high expectations for how they’re treated. They expect to be treated with kindness, love, affection, and respect. They do not tolerate emotional or physical abuse. They expect their partner to be loyal. This does not mean they expect their relationship to be free of conflict. Even happily married couples argue. Conflict is healthy because it leads to greater understanding. People should not expect to solve all of the problems in their relationship, either. My Love Lab studies found that almost ⅔ of relationship conflict is perpetual."

I think we truly have to work harder on finding ways to connect and understand our partners better.

Know yourself

Relationship these days are hard!.... well that’s what they say, my honest opinion I think it’s only hard because we truly don’t know each other and when I mean each other I really  mean more so we don’t know our self. We still keep trying to figure ourselves out in an relationship instead taking time to truly get to know what we want and who we are as a person. We can’t find ourselves aside another person.

Relationship Boundaries